I said to him ........ You wear pants don't you?
He said to me ................ Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said .. That's a good idea - you working in the kitchen while I sit on the couch and fart
He said to me...... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him ....... Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
He said to me....... Why don't women blink during foreplay?
I said to him .... They don't have time.
He said to me.... How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him...... I don't know; it has never happened.
He said to me... Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good- looking?
I said to him...... They already have boyfriends.
He said.....What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
I said..... A widow.
He said to me.... Why are married women heavier than single women?
I said to him....... Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.